Top 10 Epic Rap Battles of History

YOUTUBE phenomenon Epic Rap Battles of History returns for its highly anticipated fourth season on Monday 10th November.

My sister and I are big fans of Nice Peter & EpicLLOYD’s series, and we have (finally) come up with our own Top 10 battles for your enjoyment.

Please be advised that these battles contain strong language and adult themes.

#10: Gandhi vs. Martin Luther King Jr.

This battle between two of the most famous pacifist who ever lived proves that you can not threaten your opponent in a rap battle.

Best line: “I am celibate because I don’t give a f**k!”

#9: Einstein vs. Stephen Hawking

The best stand-alone battle of the first season. This battle can be enjoyed by anyone and not just by Oxbridge Physics graduates, though some basic knowledge of this pair’s work does help.

Best Line: “There are 10 million, million, million, million, million, million, million, million, million particles in the universe that we can observe. Your mama took the ugly ones and put them into one nerd.”

#8: Mozart vs. Skrillex

This battle features one of, if not the best backing track of the whole back catalogue. If you like classical music or dubstep then this is one for you. Skrillex, to his credit, actually performed this live as, and with, himself during YouTube Comedy Week.

Best Line: “Oh yes, I’ve heard that EP, and see, I transcribed it here. Tell me, what comes after the 68th measure of diarrhea?”

#7: Frank Sinatra vs. Freddie Mercury

E.R.B. went on hiatus over the summer of 2012, leading to President Theodore Roosevelt’s personal intervention…sort of. A few days later the series was back rocking us in its own way with two singing legends.

Best Line: “I’m a champion of the world, extinguished in his prime!”

#6: Barack Obama vs. Mitt Romney

Released a few weeks before polling day in the 2012 U.S. Presidential Election. This battle is the most-watched of all 45 so far, is the longest battle, was the first of three to have gone Gold in America, and was nominated for Video of the Year at the 1st YouTube Music Awards. It’s been heavily implied that President Obama himself has seen this battle.

Best Line: “The President shall not be the shiniest of two turds!”

#5: Hitler vs. Vader (Trilogy)

The first battle got the series noticed, the second launched season two, and the third launched season three. Not surprisingly these battles contain the blackest lines in the series, but also some of its best production.

Best Line: “You got one bitch pregnant then gave in to the hate. Now you’re 6’6″ and black but can’t get a date.”

#4: Goku vs. Superman

These two alien defenders of Earth have met before on YouTube and their appearance against each other in this series was long overdue. But the wait was well worth it. This battle won Best Music Video at the 4th Streamy Awards.

Best Line: “There’s only one way that this battle’s gonna end: One more Superman who’s never gonna walk again!”

NOTE: We couldn’t agree on Silver and Bronze, so we decided to award joint-Silver medals to…

#2=: Artists vs. Turtles

The season three finale sees Leonardo, Donatello, Raphael and Michelangelo battling their namesakes. Nuff said.

Best Line: “You beat the Foot, but it won’t go well, when you catch an Italian boot to the half shell!”


#2=: Rasputin vs. Stalin

Up to this point the lack of Russians in the series was becoming a running gag, so there was little surprise to see season two’s finale featuring some. Wink wink.

Best Line: “You’ll find that the ex-KGB is the best MC in the ex-C.C.C.P.!”

These two couldn’t be split because my sister is an artist and has studied the Renaissance, while I enjoy studying 20th Century history and the U.S.S.R. was one of my favourite G.C.S.E. history modules.

But there was absolutely no doubt about our Gold medal winning rap battle, which is…

#1: Steve Jobs vs. Bill Gates

This battle featured a massive step-up in production and was the final battle to be uploaded before the summer hiatus in 2012, leaving everyone wanting more. Not only does it feature one of the series’ most memorable cameos, it won Best Original Song at the 3rd Streamy Awards.

Best Line(s): “You will never ever catch a virus on an Apple!”, “Well you can still afford a doctor if you bought a PC!”

If you want to make your own top 10 you can watch all the rap battles here. Or you can link your favourite battle(s) in the comments below


About Alex Crouch 92

I'm a lifelong Formula One fan who also enjoys classic rock/heavy metal music.
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